Rubik's Cube
by SassyWarriorPrincess1356
Summary: Beth Greene is tired of being the sweet farmer's daughter. She wants adventure. She wants danger. She wants him. But does all that come with consequences or a happy ending? NO ZA AU / Bethyl Slow Burn. Rating for violence, mentions of drugs and alcohol, and (of course) future Smut ;)
1. I'm like a kid who just won't let it go

" _Find a need and fill it."_ _Ruth Stafford Peale_

* * *

Beth Greene didn't like sneaking out. She really didn't. But Jimmy had insisted since it was the last night the whole group would have a chance to be together until Christmas. They were going down to the local hang out spot which was sort of a western style bar. Old folky country music, buck heads hung everywhere on the walls, and wooden tables all around. To her it looked just like the local Cracker Barrel with a big bar added to it. She would much rather be at home right now maybe reading, writing new songs, or just playing a couple of chords on her lovable side kick a.k.a her acoustic guitar.

The only thing exciting about going to this place tonight was a chance of seeing him again.

She had seen him a few times. More than a few times actually. She was embarrassed at the realization of the fact that she always sought him out when she came here. She would search through all the faces until her eyes fell upon him. She didn't think of it as obsession, just burning curiosity. There's a difference somewhere between the two.

Dark demeanor, greasy dark hair, torn jeans, and what seemed to be a permanent scowl on his lips. It was slightly disappointing. Never variety, just the same every night. Every once in a while he may wear a button up but mostly it was a white shirt (black, leather jacket placed behind him or beside him) with very torn up jeans. She wasn't complaining though. Far from it. He still attracted her to him like a moth to a flame. Quite a flame that was too.

This attraction was foreign to her. Never had she wanted to know something, anything about one person before. Why was he always with the same man every night? Why did he never seem to talk but just observe? If he didn't want to be at this place, why was he? It only took a few more nights, this exact night, to realize that the man that always accompanied him was his brother.

"Come on baby brother!" The man clasped the other man on the back of the shoulder roughly. "Lighten up. Learn ta not be such a fuckin prick all the damn time."

His brother was very loud and obnoxious. Very much the opposite of the man, who had now added on a piercing glare to that scowl of his. He shrugged off his brother's hand and walked to the bar to get himself another drink. Or maybe he was trying to just get away from his brother.

"Beth!"

Beth tore her eyes away from the man only to give her attention back to her group of friends. Jimmy had called out her name and her eyes rested on him as a small smile spread across his face. She returned it lazily and forced herself to listen to the conversation that was going on. There was apparently a party going on at midnight tonight and everyone was going. She would more than likely tag along, watch the others get wasted, and walk home... More than likely alone if things went her way. Boring and repetitive but she had to hold some sort of reputation. Or she felt like she still had too. But she didn't know why.

Even though graduation had been a few months ago, Beth felt as if she had never left High School. Which some people would be confused to why she was so annoyed and bored but… she wanted change. She didn't want to go to the same parties with the same people at the same houses. She wanted adventure. She wanted danger. She wanted him.

That was probably why she was so attracted to the man. He was different and definitely no one would expect, sweet farmer's daughter, Beth Greene to bring home. Her father would surely have a fit. Maybe even throw her out on the street. Surely not, but he would be mad. That she was sure of. Not that there was any chance she could even "bring home" a man like him. He didn't exactly look the type to want to meet a girl's parents. In fact, he didn't seem the type to want to talk to anyone at all.

Again, she turned her attention away from her friends (whom were preoccupied with future party plans) and looked over at the bar where she last saw him. It looked like he had decided to sit there and drink instead of go back to his table, which she couldn't really blame him. His brother had only gotten louder and more grotesque as the night went on.

The lighting had been dimmed quite a bit and the country music transitioned to almost background music compared to the volume of the different conversations going around. Maybe it was the noise he didn't like. Maybe he didn't like crowds. Or maybe he was just naturally anti-social in any type of situation. Beth prided herself on not being nosy and being the type to mind her own business, but this man… He spiked her curiosity, raised it a couple of levels for sure.

A sudden rush of confidence flooded her system and she played with the idea of going over and actually sitting with him, maybe even right next to him… If she dared. What was the worst thing he could do? Leave? Tell her to fuck off? Or maybe he would just look at her, scowl at her but just keep silent. After all, out of all the times she had seen him she couldn't recall him saying one word to anyone. Not even his brother. He would just sit and observe the activity and she once even saw him smile once or twice. But never said a word, and if he did she never caught it. It wasn't that she was creeping on him, she was just really interested in him. The reason for this much interest, you may ask? She had absolutely no idea.

Before her brain could catch up with her body she slid out from her table and started walking over to the bar. She could only imagine the facial expressions of her friends behind her. She gave a small smile to the image in her head and continued, her confidence only getting stronger and stronger and her heart beat beating faster and faster as she got closer to the seat next to him.

And it would have probably worked out okay. **Would have.**

Right before she reached the chair next to him, the man got up and swiveled around. He walked right into her, which in-turn had her walking right into his chest. She nearly fell backwards, the man's body was so strong and firm, but something was holding her in place.

His hands. His hands were holding onto her arms. They were very warm and firm, just like his whole body was. She looked up at him shyly and was surprised to see that his scowl was nonexistent. His eyes still conveyed a sense of annoyance but also something else. Embarrassment? Maybe. She couldn't quite tell.

His hands came away from her quickly and he muttered what sounded like an apology before he left her standing there. She turned slightly and watched as he made his way back to his brother. When he sat down, he made an effort not to look back at her. She could tell because his head was turned at a very odd angle.

Beth found this really funny. He may be a lot older than her but he acted like many of the boys in her school who were scared of girls and affection. The smile was still stuck on her face as she made her way to her table. No one asked but she could almost hear her friends' unasked questions through the stares they were giving her. Poor Jimmy seemed more thrown out of orbit than anyone else.

Beth just continued smiling and she was feeling almost smug with her bold decision. Never had she done something so out of the norm before. Walking up to a guy she had never met before(a complete stranger), who was clearly much older than her, to spark up a conversation. It didn't go the way she wanted it too but she still felt proud of herself for stepping out of her comfort zone.

She eventually snuck another look at him and was almost floored when her eyes met his. His eyes quickly averted and she let a small laugh leave her lips but quickly recovered and acted like she was paying attention to her group. A few minutes later she bit her lip coyly and again looked over at him and he was staring but this time he didn't look away.

Soon after she saw some movement next to him and realized his brother was ushering him out of the booth. It always was the brother's call on when they were to leave. But this time… the man hesitated. It was barely noticeable to anyone else in the room but she noticed.


	2. The world is too heavy, too big

**Chapter 2:** _The world is too heavy, too big for my shoulders_

 _"Do not be too timid and squeamish about your reactions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better."_ **Ralph Waldo Emerson**

* * *

For the first time ever, Daryl Dixon wasn't ready to leave the bar when his brother was. Whether he wanted to admit it to himself or not, he had wanted to stay. He wasn't even going to kid himself by chalking it up to him just being a little drunk. He knew why he had wanted to stay. And it was making his inner self mock him brutally.

When Daryl walked outside and felt the first burst of chilled air against his bare arms and face, he immediately put on his leather jacket. Summer was already on its way out and Daryl added this to his ongoing shit list for the week. He hated cold weather more than Merle's late night shitty gatherings. He never wanted to come but he also didn't trust Merle not to be an idiot or a complete jackass and get himself thrown in the slammer.

He reached in his jacket pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. He chose one and pulled it out, sticking it between his dry lips and lighting it. He took a few slow deep inhales and let the soft buzz of the nicotine take over his system.

Merle was talking with Carol discussing some business that Daryl couldn't give two shits about. He slowly exhaled the smoke that had been harboring in his lungs as he became impatient. Either he was going to go back in the bar or get in the car and have Carol drive his ass home.

Daryl wasn't usually in this bad of a mood. He was just tired and stressed. Rent was due at the end of the week and he had no clue where he was going to get the other half from. Merle's half. Merle had been fired not at all recently from his mechanic job for showing up hammered and cussing out customers too many times. Daryl had bugged him about getting a job but Merle didn't seem too adamant on finding one. Which why should he? Daryl always saved his ass. Always took care of him. And Merle acted like Daryl **should** do these things and that Merle deserved it after taking care of his "defenseless, punk ass" when they were kids.

But Merle seemed to forget about a point in Daryl's adolescence when he had completely abandoned Daryl. Daryl hadn't been completely alone but he would have chosen to be alone instead of what he got stuck with. Merle had left him to fend for himself against his abusive, dead-beat father. Which was far worse than just being alone.

Daryl shook away the dark thoughts creeping into his mind and threw the nearly smoked-through cigarette butt down, roughly extinguishing it with his boot. He switched his thoughts to something that was still circling around his mind.

That girl.

She had caught him so off guard he had frozen completely in his place. Like an idiot. But when he had grabbed her arms to keep her clumsy self from falling, he had taken the time to look her over. She was small and petite, had long blonde hair pulled up in a ponytail, and over all the fragrances in that bar he could tell she smelled like strawberries. And, damn, when she looked up at him with those big innocent blue eyes he just had to get out of there before he made a fool of himself.

And of course his dumb ass just couldn't stop looking at her. She caught him both times and he would have kept staring like a total creep too if his brother hadn't ushered them to leave. He could blame it on the fact that it had been a long time since he had any kind of woman in any way. Which had been mostly by choice.

" _You ain't no faggot are ya'?"_

The words from his brother earlier that day echoed in his head. No. He wasn't. He just didn't seem to like anyone. Never really had a reason too. It had always just been him and his brother, except for when Merle left that one time. But even that relationship was almost always strained and pulled until the weak elasticity could almost break apart. Came close to breaking completely apart a couple of times, but still never did. Daryl needed his brother because Merle was the only person in this damn world that he cared about still, even if he was a complete dick sometimes.

But that girl had scorched him. He could almost still feel her arms in his hands. Involuntarily, he squeezed his hands into fists and scraped his nails over his palms.

 _Absolutely_ _fucking ridiculous._

After the two men left with a few of their acquaintances, Beth sat back in her seat and returned her full attention to her group of friends. The topic was back on the "total rager" that was going down tonight. In total, fifty people were going. Yes, fifty 16 to 18 year old students/graduates were going to show up at one huge house with absolutely no parental supervision.

Laci Hetherington's parents were both gone for business so it was a perfect spot for a huge party. Beth felt bad for Laci. More than likely, Laci had probably only invited a small group of people which then morphed into a small army of people. Things like these spread like wildfire. Laci was also the type of girl who was too nice to say anything like "Get the fuck out!" or "Go the fuck away!" so more than likely she was going to have a huge mess to clean up and a lot of explaining to do when something was damaged in the house.

Since Jimmy was her ride, Beth was going to have to go at least for a little while. Laci's house was definitely closer to her home than this bar was, not to mention the fact that Laci's house was in a safer neighborhood too. Once Beth got there, she would just hang out for a few and then walk home because she highly doubted Jimmy would want to leave before 1 o'clock.

Beth's eyes made their way to the big grandfather clock by the entrance. The clock read 11:30. She sighed and no one seemed to notice her apparent disinterest in the next topic of conversation, which had switched to the popular university everyone seemed to be going to in a week's time. A university she was not going to be going to. In a city she was not going to be living in.

She wasn't bitter. She wasn't jealous. She was actually quite content with the thought of her friends going off and leaving her behind. Okay, maybe content isn't the right word. She had come to terms with this a long time ago though. She never wanted to go to a university. Her dream didn't include tens of thousands of dollars in tuition money but it did include a lot of luck, blood, sweat, and tears.

She was going to make it into the music business. She was going to get out of this town. She was going to ditch the small town farm life for bright lights, guitars, and concerts.

It had always been her plan to move to Nashville. Unlike NYC and California, it wasn't that far from Georgia and they didn't call it the music city for nothin'. Ever since Freshman Year, she had been saving every penny from her day-care job and now she had enough to at least get her out of Georgia. She already had an agent who wanted to get her in with the first company that would sign her so that was one huge step taken. The next was actually finding a record company that would sign her on. Her agent had high hopes but Beth was starting to get pessimistic. It had already been a few weeks and still no one had contacted them.

Her thoughts were interrupted by her friends getting up signaling it was time to go. Beth peaked at her phone to make sure her parents and her stepbrother hadn't randomly checked on her during the night and found that her bed was empty. Her phone was clear of missed calls from relatives but she had a dozen text messages from other friends asking if she was going to be at Laci's house tonight. She didn't bother replying, they would know soon enough.


	3. Lost in the playground

Note: Oh my goodness. I am so appreciative of all the nice reviews I've been getting in what? That past 2 DAYS?! I'm so glad y'all are enjoying this as much as I am. And I hope I won't disappoint you… That is not an option. I love all of you. 3333  
TRIGGER WARNING: There is a tiny scene of an attempted non-consensual action. It's nothing graphic (if it was I would have put it as a warning at the top). I'm just warning y'all.

* * *

 _"Have a heart that never hardens, a temper that never tires, a touch that never hurts."_ **Charles Dickens**

* * *

The car ride from the bar was quiet. Not only quiet, it was awkward. Jimmy kept looking over at Beth and Beth kept staring through the closed window, watching the stars and the illuminous moon shine and twinkle in unison. She had been waiting for him to say something but for the whole ride he had said a total of zero words. She could see him in the window's reflection giving her side glances but ultimately staying mute.

He didn't seem angry. But he also didn't seem like himself either. Normally he would be talking her ear off but now he was being eerily silent. Like he was trying to think of something to say to her. She could tell something was bothering him and she was pretty sure she knew what it was. She may have thought her staring and smiles had been discreet but maybe Jimmy had seen her. Maybe he was catching on to her crush. But if it was bothering him, he was being silent about it. Or just didn't know how to bring it up or talk to her about it. Which seemed silly because it should be simple. They never had difficulty being honest with each other in the past. She did feel slightly guilty for being interested in another man but it wasn't like they were married. They weren't even technically dating, not anymore.

Jimmy had wanted a break. And Beth had been fine with that until she found out from a friend that he only wanted a break so he could go and screw Becky Lewis. He more than likely had been screwing Becky before even asking Beth for a break. Their relationship had hit a dry spell and Jimmy had been distant way before he brought up the whole "taking a break for a little while". He wasn't the type who could hide things for too long and he was a terrible face-to-face liar. That's why when she found out about him and Becky she had felt blindsided. Beth never thought, in a million years, he could be that sneaky and deceitful. A break was just simply that, a break. If he had wanted to break up he should have said he wanted to break up. Not keep Beth waiting while he went off with another girl to get his "needs" taken care of.

It had taken Beth weeks before she even wanted to be in the same room with Jimmy, none the less hang out with him. He had hurt her. Hurt her bad. She thought she'd never be able to forgive him. But never say never, they say. Slowly but surely he had won her over again. Becky had left him high and dry one night. She had broken things off with him completely and without warning and after that night he had become extremely pathetic. He apologized to Beth every night and day and Beth hated to admit it but she had felt sorry for him.

Beth liked Jimmy. He would always be her best friend. The spark just wasn't there anymore. It had been, but he had blown the fuse and it was beyond repair. She still strung him along though. Like a love sick puppy who knew he had peed on the floor and wanted to be forgiven for it. And Beth milked it too. That's probably where the guilt part comes in.

Suddenly his dad's old pick-up truck came to a stop on the back road they had turned on and jerked Beth's gaze from the beautiful night sky to Jimmy. Jimmy was staring at the road ahead of them. Beth was unsure of what to say so she just sat there and continued staring at him.

Finally, he spoke.

"Beth. What are we doing?"

She wasn't too caught off guard by the question but still didn't feel she had the answer nor wanted to answer it, "We're going to Laci's."

Through all the years they had known each other, Beth had witnessed Jimmy go through about every emotion but anger wasn't one of them. Frustration? Yes. Stress? Yes. Annoyance? Yes. But she had never seen Jimmy get angry. Never say never. "Bull shit Beth. You know what I mean." Jimmy's hands were now down in his lap and he was now facing her.

Beth had the urge to look out the passenger window again but she didn't. He did deserve an answer. So she gave him one, "We're… Jimmy, you know I like you. You're my best friend."

His anger didn't seem to fester. It just seemed to bristle even more. "Look, I know I screwed up. I was young and dumb, but you can't hold that over my head forever."

Now it was her turn to get angry, "You can't be serious. 'I was young'? That's your excuse? It happened a couple of weeks before graduation! You're saying graduating made you a man?!"

Jimmy came back at her, "It wasn't like I didn't have my reasons."

Beth's eyes widened. Something broke in her and she suddenly felt claustrophobic in his truck, like she couldn't breathe. Jimmy knew he had hit a nerve but he didn't seem to care and continued, "We went out for what? Three months? And nothing. I mean the kissin' and touchin' was great but…"

She couldn't believe what he was saying. Why was he saying this? They had talked about this. About how she had wanted to wait and how she wasn't ready. He had seemed fine with it. He had always been okay with it. This wasn't her Jimmy. This was someone else.

Jimmy let out an exasperated sigh, unbuckled his seat belt, and slid over to her. She scooted back into the corner and shoved at him to go back. His hands came up to frame her face and even though she was struggling and telling him no, he forced his lips on hers. She thought he was only trying to prove a point but realized, alarmingly, that that's not all he was trying to do. When she went to depart from him he used all his strength to keep her pinned between him and the passenger door.

This was definitely not her Jimmy. And she did not like this person one bit.

She pushed at his chest and when he wouldn't let up she brought her leg up from the floorboard and put it between them, putting her in an upright fetal position. That didn't work either because he just grabbed onto her thigh and wrenched it the side and forced himself between her legs.

"Stop, Jimmy. STOP." Beth was scrambling. She wasn't to the point of freaking out but she was getting there. She didn't know what came over him but this was not okay. They had made out before but it had been mutual. Always. This was not mutual. Not at all. Never in her mind would she think Jimmy, the soft-spoken southern gentleman, would be forcing himself on her.

His mouth was all over hers and it was sloppy and dominating, and he was still in between her legs. Her seat belt was biting into her side but that was the least of her concerns at the moment. Especially when his hands went from her head to the front of her pants.

Beth's brain short circuited instantly. She took advantage of him being too interested in moving things along and immediately wound back her right fist and slugged him right in the jaw, slightly got his nose too. It was at an awkward angle but it worked. Jimmy grabbed the side of his face and she kicked him in the stomach, simultaneously pushing him back to the driver's side.

Beth was still in the tight corner of the passenger seat, breathing hard and uneven as the adrenaline continued to course through her veins. She was furious. She felt dirty. And she felt… She didn't even know what else she felt but it was a horrible feeling. She instantly unbuckled her seatbelt, grabbed the door handle, and pushed herself out the door. She heard her name being called but she didn't care. There was no way in hell she was getting back in that car.

The air was cold and crisp but not unbearable. The moon and stars were her only light source at the moment but she didn't care. She wasn't going to spend one more second with that jackass. As far as she was concerned, everything she had known about Jimmy got incinerated into a pile of ash. Along with their friendship.

It was almost as if the intensity of her anger was heating her up from the inside. Like a furnace. She didn't like this feeling. It was making her sick and she felt like stopping. Stopping and flinging herself to the ground to just get rid of all the contents inside her. To get rid of this burning anger. But she needed to get home. It was dark and even though she wasn't on a bad side of town, she was still on a back road. Thankfully she knew where she was. They hadn't been that far from Laci's house and she knew she was just a little longer ways from home. While she was walking on the empty street she had some time to mull the whole occurrence over. God knows she didn't want to, but it was begging to be analyzed instead of just being stored somewhere in the deepest darkest part of her psyche.

Beth wanted to believe Jimmy wouldn't have gone through with it if she hadn't punched him but she couldn't. And that scared her. How someone you've known for almost your whole life can snap like that. She hadn't done anything to deserve it. She hadn't even encouraged it any way.

She didn't even try to hold back the tears, they just started slipping form her eyes. Warm droplets cascading down her face. She did the useless motion of bringing her hand to her face to wipe them away but of course, they just kept coming.

Maybe she had done something. Maybe acting interested in another man made him feel the need to prove himself. To be the alpha male or something like that. Testosterone, or hormones, or whatever the hell you wanted to call it. Maybe this was her fault. Maybe he had seen her smile at that man, bite her lip flirtatiously the second time she snuck a glance at him.

 _Beth Greene. You know this isn't your fault._

She smiled through her tears at Maggie's voice in her head. She missed her sister. She missed her sister a lot. Beth barely got to see Maggie anymore and right now, her big sister would know what to say to make her feel better. She needed to talk to her. Beth couldn't wait until she got home and to her cozy room, she needed to talk to Maggie now.

Beth immediately got her phone out and dialed her sister's number, hoping it wasn't too late and that Maggie would answer.


	4. Open the sky for me now

**Note: Still loving all the support. I am trying to update and add a new chapter every 1-3 days but I am freaking out over the premiere guys. I am too excited. ANYWAYS, this chapter is kinda short and very much a filler but more exciting chapters to come.**

 **And yes. I love Ralph Waldo Emerson quotes.**

* * *

" _Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense."_ **– Ralph Waldo Emerson**

* * *

"Beth, I cannot believe this. Wait until I make my next trip home. He's gonna wish he-"

Beth let a small giggle slip as she kicked a small pebble across the road, "Maggie, it's okay."

There was a pause and then Maggie started again, "Beth, it's not okay. His balls should be hangin' off a damn tree limb right now."

Beth laughed harder, "Maggie!"

Her sister joined in with her laughter as Beth came to the street the farm was on. She still had a good ways to go but talking to Maggie was making the walk seem shorter. Beth couldn't wait until she got in her own room and into her own bed. To snuggle up into her warm, comfy comforter and just sleep. Sleep through the whole rest of the night. She would no doubt probably sleep through the next day if they didn't have church in the morning.

Maggie's voice cut Beth out of her thoughts, "Speaking of trouble, what is daddy's little girl doing out at this time of night?"

Beth rolled her eyes but gave a sly smile, "Come on, Maggs… You were my age once."

"Yes, that's what scares me." Beth heard Maggie yawn through the phone and Beth almost yawned in response. Beth was tired. The adrenaline rush plus the events of the night had left her exhausted.

"Don't worry, Maggie. I'm fine. Everything's fine."

"Well apparently I taught you well since you can clearly handle some grabby teenage boy."

Beth's smile widened, "The knowledge I got from those fights between us sure wasn't wasted."

It's like the thought immediately popped into Beth's head and before she could stop herself she blurted out, "So there's this man…"

Beth could hear Maggie's gasp and then a small giggle, "Beth… My sweet Beth… A man? Who is this man?"

Beth wished she hadn't said anything but quickly replied, "'S no one." Beth shrugged wanting to wish she could take the words back. Beth immediately realized she didn't even know his name. The only words he had ever spoken to her, or more like mumbled, was an apology. An apology that she hadn't even quite deciphered yet, the words had been so low and grumbly.

But he had looked at her. Twice! He could have just not looked at her again and acted like they had never bumped into each other. But he hadn't. He had instead continued to look at her until his brother had made him leave.

"Don't give me that Beth. Now spill it." Maggie was being impatient and Beth sighed. She was almost to the house, the gravel of the long driveway crunching underneath her shoes.

"He's just… someone I've seen at the bar lately." Beth was purposefully dodging her sister's probing.

"Seen or been seeing?"

Beth sighed again, "I've just… He's someone I've laid eyes on a couple of times. No one special. Forget I said anything, okay?"

There was a long silence between them and before Beth knew it she was at the side of her house.

"Well I'm home." Beth said, relief flooding through to the receiving end of the phone. "When will you come visit?"

There was a silence and Beth frowned, knowing it wouldn't be soon.

"I'm sorry Bethy but… I have a workload so high I can't even see where it ends. Don't worry, I'll visit as soon as I can. I'll even bring Glenn with me."

Beth smiled and nodded. Beth loved Glenn. There wasn't anyone else out there for her sister, especially one that loved Maggie as much as he did.

"Okay, I'm holdin' ya' to that."

"I know you will, Beth. Now go, get some sleep."

Beth nodded again, "Okay Maggs, love you."

"Love you too, Bethy."

Before climbing up the side of her house, Beth took one more look at the sky. The stars were still out, shining as bright as ever. The moon still illuminous and bright as when she had looked up at it from Jimmy's truck.

She wouldn't let this get to her. She wouldn't let him be the source of her depression and darkness again. Not like last time. Her hand came to touch the faint scar on her wrist and rubbed it a little. She refused to let it get to her again.

* * *

Daryl had seen her walk out of the bar, hand in hand with that kid she was sitting with. She hadn't seen him, at least he didn't think she had. She just hopped right in the rusted, old pick-up truck and drove off with her friends behind them.

He shook his head, and put out his third cigarette and yelled, "Merle, ya' ready?"

Merle had been talking with Carol non-stop about trying to get him hired back at the shop. She had already said she would try about a hundred times and he was still blabbing on about how he had changed and he wouldn't fuck up again. Daryl scoffed and shook his head as the words left his brother's mouth.

"Shut the hell up, I'm comin."

And he did. They started walking towards their car and when they got in Daryl looked at his brother before starting the engine.

* * *

As Beth opened her window she nearly slipped and fell on her floor. And she would have, if she hadn't grabbed a hold of the side quickly. She let out a breath of relief as she swung her legs over the side and lightly dropped to her bedroom floor. After closing her window, she immediately stripped off her clothes and quickly put on a big T-shirt and some pajama bottoms. After she took her shoes off she immediately wished she had kept her socks on. The cool hardwood floors had frozen her feet and she almost yelped at the unwelcome sensation.

She dropped down in her bed and curled up in her sheets, immediately warming herself to the core. She gave a lazy grin as she immediately drifted off to sleep, welcoming the sweet dreams to come and willing away any nightmares that may try to sneak past her sub-conscious defenses.


	5. I know I will figure it out

**Note: Almost 4,000 words... It should be two chapters but... Why the hell not? You guys deserved it. Okay, mono's a bitch. That's my excuse. I had absolutely no motivation to do anything. It sucked! Okay now that that's over with: When Beth and Daryl actually come together, it will be all Beth POV. I'm kinda trying this new writer thing of being attentive to POV and controlling how crazy it can get. So… Just thought you should know. Whoever's still with this story, thanks! And enjoy.**

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 _"Don't worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss when you don't even try."_ **– Jack Canfield**

* * *

 _One week later…_

Dreary and grey. Sad and depressing. The weather was not helping Daryl Dixon's attitude at all.

Rain puddles had formed from the day's ongoing rainfall and Daryl scowled as his left foot landed in a slightly deeper puddle than the normal ones he had come in contact with. He hated this weather. This transition from summer to fall. The cold breeze bit at his face and made him have to wrap his jacket more snugly around himself, his scowl growing more menacing and his eyes forming into a harsh glare. He should have driven the car today. Didn't have a working heater but it at least would keep the wind chill of of him.

He had picked up extra hours and he barely had got any sleep the previous night. His hands were burnt from a couple of new teenage hires not knowing what the fuck they were doing and almost killing themselves with the blowtorch. Idiots. Fucking immature idiots. Not to mention, his boss had yelled at him because of said idiots. Told him he needed to be more observant and make sure he didn't be so careless. Just a bunch of fucking bull shit he really didn't want to hear. Daryl had left swiftly before he got himself fired.

Even with the extra overtime he got that day, he was still only going to make rent barely. There was no way in hell he would be doing this again. It wasn't good for his health and sanity. He did love to work and he usually didn't sleep that much anyways but he still didn't want to do it every day, double shifts back to back. He was going to tell Merle to get a job. And finally put his foot down. Which was slightly unnerving to Daryl. He never went against his brother. Even at his age… His brother was still his "older brother".

But sometimes things have to change. And they were going to change.

Merle was going to have to get a job and help him out. Merle had already had a week and he had made absolutely no move to get another job. Just at home on his lazy ass and watched TV. Smoked some weed, drank some booze, and went to sleep. Daryl would get home and his brother would either be passed out on the couch or at the bar, later coming home and then passing out on the couch.

And Daryl was tired of it. Absolutely fucking tired of it.

After his mind succeeded in getting him more fired up, he climbed the apartment stairs with more confidence than he thought possible. More confidence than he thought he could ever muster out of himself. As he made it to the door of his apartment, he reached for his keys in his jacket pocket, cursing as he dropped them from his hands shaking from the cold. Or adrenaline. He couldn't quite tell at the moment and didn't care. He opened the door, shrugged out of his jacket, and hung it on the coat rack by their door.

"Merle! Gotta talk ta ya 'bout soemthin'." Daryl yelled as he went to the kitchen to make some coffee. He wished they had hot chocolate. He got the coffee grounds out from one of the kitchen cabinets along with a coffee filter. He situated the coffee filter and then poured 2 scoops into it.

"Ya want some coffee?" Daryl yelled again. No reply. Daryl closed the coffee maker top.

 _Great. Probably out at the bar again. Drinking away the mooched drinks he'll get someone to buy for him. Just fan-fucking-tastic. Then he'll come home and be an even bigger asshole to deal with… A drunken asshole._

Daryl glared as he filled the coffee maker with water and harshly pushed the brew button. He watched as the coffee brewed for a few minutes, devising a plan of action on how exactly he was going to bring up the subject of employment to Merle. After a while he just sighed and started making his way to the bathroom to take a much needed shower.

His heart might actually have stopped for a second. Or two. The scene in front of him that greeted his sights suddenly had his whole body on fire with rage. Hands balled up into fists, eyes wide with anger.

"Get that shit outta the house!" His blood was definitely boiling, hotter than the coffee that had been done brewing a while ago but now was completely forgotten.

Merle had awoken from his passed out state. He clearly hadn't comprehended what Daryl had said. "Hey, lil brother! Was up?"

Daryl's eyes narrowed, "What's up? What's fucking up is this shit on the damn table!" Daryl yelled as he pointed to the white powdery substance and the pills splayed out on the table.

"What man, 's jus-" Merle slurred but didn't get to finish because Daryl continued yelling, "I know what the fuck it is! Get it out of the damn house. NOW!"

Merle was shocked. And maybe a little confused too. His brother was too slow, actually his brother wasn't making any move to do anything at all, so Daryl came over and grabbed what he could. He didn't even hesitate when he swung the bathroom door open and threw the substance in the toilet.

"You sum'bitch!" Merle tried to get off the couch but he stumbled and ended up falling on the ground instead.

Daryl shook his head when he came back from the bathroom, beer bottles and white dust all over the coffee table. Daryl's control snapped like the flimsy twig it had been for a while, "The fuck man?! You can't afford your half of the damn rent but you can go out and buy acid and coke? Landlord could come in at any moment and kick us both out on our asses. Already has his suspicions after the last time you pulled something like this shit! Call the fuckin cops and we'd both go to the slammer. You want that?!" Daryl watched as his brother struggled a little more. Daryl growled out, "You're a piece of fuckin' work man."

Daryl watched as his stoned, intoxicated brother finally managed to sit up and face him with a very disgusted, irritated look. "Wha's it ta ya?" Merle's slur taking on a grumbling edge. "You're takin' care of me. Like I did for ya when ya couldn't do shit! Just poor little boy with his hand in his pants. Couldn't defend himself worth a shit! Fuckin' pussy." Merle spit over at Daryl and Daryl watched as the spit hit right in front of his shoe.

Daryl felt like punching a wall. Or setting the apartment on fire. Or blowing something up. His rage was making him see red and Merle was the reason for it. Like he had been ever since Daryl agreed to let him move in.

It was all Merle's fault and Daryl wanted to hurt him. He never had wanted to hurt his brother, like physically cause harm to him. But now, he almost couldn't resist punching or kicking him right now. Instead Daryl breathed in and tried to breathe out the anger. It didn't work but he decided to voice his anger rather than use it to put Merle in the hospital, "You didn't... You didn't look after me 'cause you wanted ta help. Maybe at first, but then ya started usin' it against me. Not ta mention, you left. You fuckin' left, man!"

"Bull fuckin' shit." Merle slurred again. "I cared too much for your ass. Didn't do no good apparently."

Daryl knew his brother was under a lot of influences but that didn't mean anything to Daryl. It had finally clicked for Daryl. Merle had to leave. And it hit Daryl like a ton of bricks. The last thing Daryl wanted to do was get rid of his brother. It was the last thing he wanted to do. But Daryl didn't know what else to do. Sure, Daryl could keep him around. Work doubles and keep them barely alive, but not with his brother doing this shit. Not again.

Daryl took in a deep breath, turned on his heels and headed for the door, stopping only to roughly shrug his jacket back on. His hand landed on the door knob but before his hand twisted, Daryl yelled over his shoulder, "When I get back, you best be gone."

"Where ya' goin man?" Merle slurred even slower than before, Daryl could hear him trying to get up this time.

"What's it ta ya'? Never cared before, won't care now." Daryl grabbed the door and slammed it before Merle could yell out whatever his stoned, drunk mind could come up with.

Beth didn't want to be here but her friend, one of the few who hadn't gone off to college, had insisted. Beth twirled the straw in her ginger ale and laughed at her friends comment on one of the guys who had tried to sweep Beth off her feet.

"Gotta give him brownie points for tryin'." Beth murmured as another giggle slipped from her lips.

She felt drunk. Which was silly because she didn't have a drop of alcohol in her system. She blamed her friend for this giddy, excited attitude. Which was great. A good change from how she had been lately.

Beth had slipped into a little stage of depression after the last night she had gone to this bar. She didn't go as far as she did last time. She just didn't feel like leaving her room much. Actually at all. Of course, her family had noticed. Her father had come upstairs to her room to check on her. And she had been defensive. Which probably came off as rude and angry.

But thank the lord, that her father had plenty of experience with fathering teenage girls He didn't push but just told her, "Alright, doodlebug, just be careful." In response to her abrupt, "I'm fine."

His nurturing nature had made her angrier at the time but later that night she had slipped down the stairs and met her dad in the living room. He was in the love seat, reading his Bible. His eyes had slowly left the scripture in front of him and a small smile had lightened his features.

Beth had broken down instantly. Through her tears she could see him get up from his chair and walk over to her. His arms came around her in a huge, fatherly hug. She wrapped her arms around him and apologized for her behavior. She didn't think he could clearly understand what she was saying, she was crying so hard, but she heard a, "It's alright, Bethy. I know."

He still did not pry which she mentally thanked him for. She didn't want to drag out this Jimmy-ordeal any longer than it had to be. Which only lasted the rest of the week. It still tugged at her. The memory of what he had done didn't make her sad anymore but angry. And it wasn't that Beth was foreign to feeling anger, but she had never had something that could pop into her mind and make her so incredibly… pissed off. She's had things make her sad constantly but never constantly angry.

And that anger had been gone for the majority of the night, until it wasn't.

"You said he wasn't comin'!"

Beth immediately scooted her stool back, so fast and hard she almost tipped it over. Once her feet hit the ground she grabbed her purse and grey, knit cardigan. She started shrugging it on as her friend denied her knowledge of Jimmy showing up. Beth could care less if this was her friend's doing or not. She just had to get out of there before he saw her.

"Beth!"

 _Damn it._

She had been pulling on her cardigan and right as she had passed the main tables, he had turned at the last second and set his sights on her. She immediately picked up her speed and made it to the door.

She didn't know what the hell she was going to do. Her friend had been her ride home and the bar was a long ways from home. She took out her phone. She was going to call her dad. Sure, he may be angry for her location, but at least she hadn't snuck out this time.

Someone grabbed a hold of her arm. She should have gotten more distance between her and the bar.

She turned angrily around, "Jimmy, leave me alone!"

Jimmy let go but continued with his first attempt to apologize, "Beth. I just wanna talk." Beth was about to hit the call button but she stopped. Jimmy continued, encouraged by her actions, "I'm so sorry, ya gotta believe me."

Beth sighed, her attention leaving her phone and settling on Jimmy. She had to stop running. She had to face her problems. "Jimmy, you can apologize for however long you want. But what you did… What you said… What you were going to do… Nothing can erase that. Go home. And just leave me alone. Please?"

She had gotten it out. She had finally told him. And now he would leave her alone. She turned to start walking again. Jimmy grabbed her elbow again and this time jerked so hard her phone fell out of her hand. She wanted to scream but all she managed to do was push at him. She managed a, "Leave me alone!" but he was still speaking to her and pulling her. Making her talk to him. Wanting to make her forgive him.

Right as she was about to scream to let her go again, she felt his grasp leave her arm.

"She told ya to leave her the fuck alone."

All she saw was his back, his very broad shouldered back. Black jacket, jeans, dark hair. She knew who he was immediately. And her heart felt as if it had jumped up her throat and was seeking escape. Where the hell did he come from?

Jimmy was on the ground staring up at him defiantly. The man had clearly grabbed a hold of Jimmy and swung him to the ground. Man-handled him. She didn't know how she kept from giggling at the image, probably because she still was trying to figure out the events unfolding in front of her. And because it was probably not appropriate timing.

The man was just standing there looking down at Jimmy. Daring him to do something. Willing him to go away. Or maybe it was her who was hoping he'd just get up and walk away. She may greatly despise him right now, but she didn't want him to hurt himself. At least not too badly.

Jimmy did get up but, to Beth's dismay, he did not leave. She saw the way he looked at the man and some part of her knew that he was realizing who this was. This man was the one she had been staring at that night, and all those other nights. He was the one that made him jealous.

The man seemed to shake his head as Jimmy stood there, sizing him up. "Whatever ur thinkin' kid… Don't." The man grumbled out. "'M not in the mood, tonight." It was low and gravely but both of them heard it. "Jus' leave."

Jimmy seemed to think over his options as Beth just wrapped her arms around herself. She could leave. She could pick up her phone, and just leave. She could. She didn't.

Jimmy finally put his "stand-off" to an end and slowly started walking away. The man followed his movement very closely, as if he was expecting Jimmy to stop and do something stupid. Jimmy had stopped close to her which made the man's hands ball up in fists. Beth had looked from the man to Jimmy and Jimmy took one last glance at her and for one moment she thought he was actually going to try something. His eyes were wild, probably because of all the adrenaline coursing through him. But there was also a tiny bit of hurt in them. Beth gave a shake of her head. She didn't know what she was trying to communicate to him but it was on the lines of, "Leave." For one moment she thought he was going to say something. Something more than likely crass and hurtful but he ultimately turned towards the parking lot, trotting away to where his truck was parked.

Jimmy was an idiot but he wasn't careless.

A couple of beats passed by of them just standing there until she heard the unmistaken sound of Jimmy's dad's pick-up truck roaring to life and driving out. Beth swiftly brought her eyes to the figure in front of her who had started moving towards the door of the bar. She didn't know what else to do so she called out, "Wait!" It was all she could think to say in a split second before he got too far away. It surprisingly stopped him. She let out a thankful sigh but her breath caught as he turned to her.

 _Great, you got his attention. Now what?_

"Uh, thanks." She said quickly. "You didn't have to do that."

He seemed to quirk an eyebrow or roll his eyes or both. She couldn't quite tell with his long hair covering a majority of his face.

"Yeah, I did." He grumbled out, avoiding eye contact. Looking like he really wanted to leave. Beth caught on to his anxiety but she was stubborn.

"No. You coulda just walked by us. So, thank you." He was silent. "Can't ya' take a thank you?"

She continued standing there, wanting him to say something. She could admit to herself that she was being quite possibly annoying… but why not throw caution to the wind? She was having a great time before Jimmy showed up and now here right in front of her was standing… Her crush? Somehow that didn't sound right.

One of his hands went to his long shaggy, dark hair that looked like it hadn't been washed in… for a while. His strong jaw angled in a sort of grimace. He looked uncomfortable. Very uncomfortable. And she didn't know why. Sure, she kept calling him back but he could leave. He didn't have to give her a benefit of a doubt. But here he was… Looking at her with most screwed up expression she thought possible of a man. He was also still not speaking.

"I'm Beth…" It seemed like a good idea. Giving a complete stranger her name.

 _Yeah, great idea._

She almost held out her hand but thought best of it. Either by fear of rejection or him biting it, she wasn't sure which.

She was surprised to see his shoulders relax a little, making him seem a little less defensive. That, in turn, made her relax a little bit. She thought about moving closer to him but she felt he would start walking away again. She got the feeling he was like one of those skittish strays that would sometimes show up at their front lawn. All mangy and starved.

His gravelly voice brought her out of her thoughts, "Daryl."

Beth let a smile slip onto her features, "Daryl… That's a start." She had meant to think that last part but it kind of flew out of her mouth before she could stop it.

Daryl seemed to be trying to figure her out. His intense gaze staring her down which made her feel tinier than she was. He grunted. She didn't know if he was agreeing with her or just grunting to hopefully make her stop talking with him.

Soon, he started moving towards the bar again. She started following him and he turned around abruptly. They were much closer than a few seconds ago and this seemed to not please him at all. "What do ya' want, girl?"

She shrank back slightly but asked, "You come by here a lot, right?"

 _Smooth. Beth. Smooth_

Daryl cocked his head to the side and his expression was of exasperation. She suddenly felt embarrassed and self conscious. Why was she doing this? He was just helping out a person in need. Nothing more. She needed to just let it go, idiotic crush or not. This man had just thrown her asshole ex off of her and now she was acting like a star struck teenager, latching on to him like he was some kind of knight in shining armor.

But she had to say something.

"I'm… I'm sorry… I just… I mean, I see you here a lot… And-" She muttered out, dragging her eyes away from him.

"'S a popular place." He told her, turning his body fully towards her, surprisingly looking engaged in the conversation.

Beth nodded, "Well, I know that." Her voice took on an incredulous edge but she quickly added, "I don't know, you just seem to stick out."

"How so?" Daryl asked, remaining at his distance but considerably more relaxed than before.

This was going better than expected.

Beth turned to where her phone laid and squatted down to retrieve it, "Not sure. Haven't really found that out yet."

He laughed. It wasn't a huge one. But she heard it. It was from low within his chest and grumbled. It could even be described as a scoff, a rough scoff. "Ain't real hard to figure out."

Beth turned back towards him, "How so?" She gave him the best coy smile she could and he shook his head, while bringing his thumbnail to his mouth to chew on it a little.

"Don't really fit in anywhere." He continued to gnaw on his thumbnail. She guessed he did that when he got nervous or anxious.

Beth nodded slowly, which maybe seemed rude but she didn't know how to respond. She always fit in, a little too easily, everywhere she went. Even though sometimes she felt alienated in her own way.

"Kinda cold out here." Daryl murmured out.

It was like Beth was just now realizing the temperature and she wrapped her arms around herself, "Yeah."

Daryl brought his hand from his mouth and looked over to the door to the bar, then back at her, "We should go inside."

We? Did he actually say we? That would mean for her to join him. Right? What else could it possibly mean?

He saw her confusion and he let a sigh leave his lips, "Well you ain't gonna leave me be so you was gonna follow me anyways." He looked down at the phone Beth was holding, "Unless, ya' had other plans in mind…"

"I don't wanna be a burden." She told him, gripping her phone tightly.

Daryl scoffed and walked the rest of the distance to the bar's entrance. She watched as he opened the door and swing his head around to lock his gaze onto hers. He shook his head in a way that seemed to be annoyance, "Getcha ass in here 'fore you catch a damn cold."


End file.
